Last night I watched, The Men Who Made Us Fat on BBC2 and it got me thinking, okay, so there are certain mental health epidemics happening in the West that are truly upsetting the individual and leaving people feeling helpless or fearful. However, it just dawned on me – do we need these epidemics, such as obesity, cancer, depression etc in order to finally encourage people to look WITHIN themselves for answers? Does it take these en mass sufferings to get people, scientists, and politicians – everyone – to start waking up to the importance of the evolution of self or individual? To ignore the bigger picture and to keep focusing on the individual problem, rather than general root cause, will only lead to further chaos and confusion on all levels.
I know my depression and anxiety sparked off my journey into the unknown territory of SELF. I didn’t know anything about the field of ‘being human’ before I had depression because no one explained to me in my youth that a whole world of wisdom exists on this subject, which exceeds the norm of being human. No one told me how I filter my experiences on a daily basis through my belief systems and programming. No one explained the power I hold within myself so all I ever felt as a young girl was helpless in the face of society’s notion of perfectionism. I was a very sensitive soul so I was, and still can be, easily conditioned to believe that happiness comes from being thin, super confident, successful and rich. This led to me being extremely angry, upset and eventually suicidal as the idea of being Natalie on this planet felt like pure punishment.
Now I can look back and say – hey, that was a great lesson, look what I learned and look how much I can relate to others now. When I read, not just self-help books, but books on neuroscience, hypnosis, psychotherapy, healing, traditional cultures etc I can see a huge picture painting the complexities of what it means to be walking around as a human being. My illnesses, my conditioning, my cancer all pushed me to look within, to feel my heart, to learn about life. Do we need these epidemics to encourage people to take responsibility for themselves, to see what lies beyond the norms of everyday life?
Reading all these books, meeting healers, therapists, and constantly exploring my own inner self, I can see the common patterns of the human mind – especially in the West. What will it take for us all to shift our negative thinking habits and extend our acknowledgment of what it is to be fully human? Do we even know what it means to be human anymore or are we purely conditioned by what society dictates and follow the rules?
Humans might need to suffer so they finally can learn about the bigger picture to being alive but they don’t need to suffer for life. The more awareness creeps into our lives on the world within, the more acceptance is encouraged from a young age to be yourself, the more the media stop spreading negativity and messages of ‘there is something wrong with you’, the more we will discover peace within ourselves and thus in life.
Sometimes it takes suffering for us to wake up. I know it did for me and there are a lot of people walking on this planet who are deeply lost and alone because they have yet to wake up to the possibilities of life being themselves.
I’m still learning, still faced with daily habits which drive me crazy but if I hadn’t started my search for meaning, for understanding the root of my suffering, for grasping the purpose of my existence, then I probably would have thrown myself off a bridge hoping that this would be the answer to a peaceful mind. I can now be incredibly grateful to the Natalie who suffered so deeply because she helped me wake up to my inner light and she pushed me on the journey of feeling truly fulfilled and magical.
Like I said, I’m a work in progress but I will be until I die and I’m really happy about this because it means I shall remain ever open to the lessons of life.